As believers, things may befall us which are not at all good for us in any way, shape, or form.
Worse, perhaps, we may not understand why any of these things befell us. After all, not every saint can look back on a trial as Joseph did and declare, “As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today.” Not every saint knows the reason why God allowed or purposed something to befall them. We don’t always know why God ordained something to befall us. But, even if we don’t know the reason why something happened to us in this life, and even if it seems like it was all for absolutely nothing, nevertheless, God promises there will be good for his people in the end.
And, although he is under no obligation to do so, God can and does cause good to come out of bad. But the highest good for believers is to become more like Christ. That is, God causes all things to work together for good for those who love God and are called according to his purpose, yes; but oftentimes we think of the “good” as something material or something tangible, when the highest and best goods for the child of God are to be more like Christ, to be more holy, to lean on the Lord more, to trust him more, to know him more, to grow in love for him more, to love others more, to pray more, to cling to the word of God more, to love the lost more, etc. These are our true treasures.
We may have lost everything — friends, family, other loved ones, property, possessions, and everything else. But what have we gained? We have our names written in heaven. We have a closer, more intimate walk with the Lord than we could ever have imagined possible. His precious promises in Scripture are so real and living, tried and proven true. His felt presence is ever with us, comforting us and guiding us. We are more sensitive to the afflictions and griefs of others. We are able to more simply lean upon the Lord, as a weaned child upon his mother’s breast. We are drawn so near and dear to the brethren, who likewise share in suffering. Timidity and fear are driven out, and we are more bold in our witness for Christ, since we realize nothing ultimately matters except the Lord, his word, and his elect. Again, these are our true treasures, because Christ is our true treasure, and the more we are like him, the more we are enriched.
In short, as long as the result is that our lives are more Christ-like, as long as we are trusting more in the Lord, hoping more in his kingdom and his will to be done, longing more to be with him, longing more for his kingdom to come, then, well, that is the important point, isn’t it? We need not understand why this or that happened. We need only to know God. It is enough to know that our gracious Heavenly Father loves us, to know that he walks with us and talks with us, to know that he guides us, to know that he takes care of us, to know that he comforts us, to know that he binds our wounds, to know that he heals our hearts, to know that he is for us and not against us. It is enough to know that God is our loving Heavenly Father.
So let us not shrink from the fiery trials which assail us and threaten to undo us, and the painful thorns which ever so deeply pierce us. Rather, may we see our trials and afflictions and griefs as God graciously and lovingly forming Christ in us, for our good and for his glory. Let us see our disgrace as God’s grace towards us. Let us see Christ making us, the unlovely and unlovable, into a bride who is beautiful because of her holiness. Let us see our weakness as his strength. For his grace is sufficient for us, his power is made perfect in our weakness. And, when such things befall us, let us fall coram Deo, and thank our gracious Heavenly Father for his love and mercy towards us who only deserved his wrath!

What’s love got to do with it?
Love’s got everything to do with being a true Christian.
1 Cor. 13:3 reads:
Alternatively, according to the ESV’s footnote, it could read:
I just wanted to make a brief but significant point. And whichever reading is adopted doesn’t really change the point I wish to make. The point is simply this: According to the Bible, it is entirely possible to give away everything one owns, and it is entirely possible to give up one’s very life, yet not have love — and specifically godly love, or genuine love for God, which is a fruit of the Spirit of God (Gal. 5:22).
We might perform good and even great works or deeds, and we might die for another person (Rom. 5:7), but have done so out of something other than love. From the perspective of God, then, nothing is gained.
Of course, one considers our Lord’s words in John 15:13, “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” But in considering these words, we must also remember the context in which this statement was spoken. In this passage, Christ calls himself the true vine, the Father the vinedresser, and the disciples the branches in the vine. He exhorts the disciples to abide in him — that is, as I understand it, to be in intimate communion with him by virtue of his union with them. To abide in Christ and his word, and to have his words abide in us, is to know Christ and his great love for us. It is only when the disciples intimately know and taste God’s immense love for them in Christ that their hearts become full of joy and thanks for him, and they become compelled to serve and live for the Lord out of the deepest, most profound sense of gratitude and love for their precious Lord. Thus, only if the disciples abide in Christ can they bear fruit. Only if the disciples abide in Christ can they obey his commandments. Only if the disciples abide in Christ can they obey the commandment to love one another. In short, union and communion with Christ leads to a growing love for God and for the word of God and for the things of God and for the people of God, which is the soil in which self-sacrificial love for others is born. Christ is the source of our love for God and others.
By contrast, what the apostle Paul is talking about in 1 Cor. 13:3 is the performance of good deeds, the sacrifice of the most precious thing a person can give up, one’s very own life, without the love of God working within a person’s heart.
So, all the greatest deeds done and all the greatest sacrifices made don’t mean jack squat without God’s love having been poured into one’s heart through the Holy Spirit (Rom. 5:5).
In other words, it is entirely possible to leave behind everything and anything (e.g. possessions, loved ones) in order to follow Christ, it is entirely possible to die a gruesome death for the sake of Christ, and at the same time it is entirely possible not to have the love of God. Given this, it is entirely possible not be a true Christian, for only the true Christian loves God and loves others with the love of God.
Of course, the true Christian can and does leave behind everything in order to follow Christ. And the true Christian is even willing to die a gruesome death for the sake of Christ. One need only read the New Testament to see the apostles, for example, leaving everything to follow the Lord. One need only read the Scriptures to witness other believers suffering horribly and dying for the sake of the Lord. Check out Hebrews 11 for starters.
But the deeds and self-sacrifices of believers are born out of God’s love, not the other way around. Performing great deeds and making tremendous sacrifices in and of themselves do not merit let alone produce the love of God, which is love for God.
Only God can produce in us the fruit of love for himself. Only God can regenerate us, convict us of our sin and rebellion before the One who is the thrice holy God, and grant us repentance and faith in Christ Jesus to receive his free gift of eternal life. If and when God does this work in us, however, then we will be humbled, thankful, and filled with the love of God for Christ, and what he did for us on the cross, by the Holy Spirit. We only love God and others with his love because he first loved us (1 John 4:19). And the more we abide in Christ, the more we fix our eyes on him and drink deeply of his sacrifice for us on the cross, drinking in the refreshing spring of water which wells up to eternal life, the more we hear preached and we preach the good news of Jesus Christ to ourselves, the more we truly know how much God loves us in giving his Son for us, then the more profound will be our gratitude and love for him. It is by knowing how broad and how long and how high and how deep God’s love for us in Christ Jesus is that our hearts are turned to love and adore him. As Paul says in Eph. 3:18-19, when we “comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge,” then we will “be filled with all the fullness of God.”
You want to love God more? Then don’t try and somehow make yourself love God more, by doing this or that, or by not doing this or that. Don’t try and exert yourself in such a way as to somehow cause love for God to naturally well up within you. It won’t happen. Rather, drink in and taste God’s love for you in Christ Jesus more! That’s the way to love God more. In other words, God’s love for us is the source and fount of our love for him.
Now, if what I’ve said is correct, then I earnestly implore you, dear reader, to be all the more diligent to make your calling and election sure (2 Cor. 13:5 and 2 Pet. 1:10). Do you know what God’s love for you truly is? Do you have this love of God which is love for God? Have you “tasted the heavenly gift” and “tasted the goodness of the word of God” (Heb. 6:4-5)? Have you “tasted that the Lord is good” (1 Pet. 2:3)? Can you exclaim in humble joy and gratitude with David, “Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good!” (Psa. 34:8)? Have you tasted God’s love for you in Christ Jesus? Do you know something of these things? You’d better make sure. Better check yourself before you wreck yourself!