There is a “slight” worry now that we no longer believe “God” exists. We don’t know who’s going to be “sovereign” (as Christians say) and in control of our lives anymore. Worse, there’s no guarantee that there’ll be justice in our lives in this world.
So here’s what I suggest we do. Before the enrollment period expires, we should sign up to have the Justice League of America protect us and take care of us, and dish out justice for us.
I just need to know Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, the Green Lantern, the Flash, and all the other DC comic book members of the JLA have got my back in case of emergencies. And by “emergencies” I mean anything that happens to me that I don’t like.
When I believed there was a God, I could trust that God had my back. And even if there was no justice for me in this life, I could nevertheless trust that in the end God would settle everything, for he is the Judge of the whole world. At the same time, I could humbly trust and obey him, and by his grace even love my enemies, knowing that whatever ill might befall me, ultimately, vengeance belongs to him.
But now that I believe there’s no God, then that means complete chaos. There’s no order or purpose in my life. I’m just a random person living a random, inconsequential, and ultimately meaningless life. And even though life is often unfair, who cares? It won’t matter once I’m dead and gone. That’s why I gotta live for me, myself, and I, and get what’s mine in the here and now, otherwise I’ll never get anything!
What does it mean if the Joker’s plot to kill Batman somehow affects me, like my home gets leveled in the process cuz it happens to be in the way of homeboy’s big pimpin’ Joker steamroller? Or what does it mean if in Lex Luthor’s plot to take over the world, he drains all the banks in the world including my bank account, so that all the money I have saved up is gone? Or what does it mean if I’m walking along, minding my own business, and a stray piano or cunning metal safe ambushes me by suddenly falling from the sky, or a fast moving cement trash can rams into me, and I’m killed — instantly?
I could randomly lose everything I’ve worked for in life! I could be randomly hurt and maimed! I could be randomly killed! And then what? Then I’d be dead! What would it all mean? What would be the point of my fleeting existence? And, more importantly for me, who’s going to avenge my death? Where’s Samuel L. Jackson in all the injustices of my life? Life is so unfair!
It makes no sense. I’m born, I live, I suffer, and then I die. I’m no more than a little vapor who’ll be vaporized before he knows it. Here for a short time, then . . . poof! Gone in (probably less than) 60 seconds. What was the point of it all? It’s all so futile.
That’s precisely why I need to know I’ve got some major superhero insurance for these messy matters of life and death and revenge. Even if life is totally unfair, even if oftentimes bad people get good things while good people get bad things throughout their lives, and even if there’s ultimately no purpose for my own random life and the suffering I must endure as I live, at least let me know that Superman can fire up his heat vision and give me some justice in this life when I need it!
Is that so much to ask for?
If the JLA becomes unavailable, however, I think we should request the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.
And I’m not necessarily talking about thee Invisible Man, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Captain Nemo, Allan Quatermain, and of course the ever beguiling Ms. Mina Murray — although it wouldn’t hurt.
Rather, I’m talking about the men in this world who to me are truly “extraordinary gentlemen,” the cream of the crop of atheistic thinking and living, the guys who publish books about the God delusion and so on. Guys like Richard Dawkins, Daniel Dennett, Samuel Harris, and all the other militant atheists that I admire.
If they don’t have the answers, then no one does. But fear not! We can trust them. We can trust that what they say is true, because they are experts and experts know everything about anything. We can trust them to lead us right in this world. If what they’re saying means that everything is happenstance and life is unfair, so be it. What they’re saying is true!
I’d rather have the cold, harsh truth and be sad because there’s no purpose to life than have some imaginary pie-in-the-sky, bye and bye, and be happy because I believe there’s a purpose in life. Sure, we both end up dead and buried, but who lived a more fulfilled, satisfied life in spite of all the pain and suffering he experienced in his life? That’s right, the believer! Um, er, wait a second . . . I mean . . . hey! That’s not the answer I was looking for! What the . . . ?!
Dang.
Whatever. Just give me the superhero insurance paperwork and I’ll fill it out, okay? And get outta here! *grumbles*
